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25 July 2006 @ 03:56 pm
when it rains, it pours  
So, we're not getting any younger, right? Which is really just an easier way to say the converse. Yesterday I was thinking, why do this case for BA 101 when it pales in the light of my mortality (besides, there's always tomorrow morning)? Instead of busying myself with BA subjects, I decided to ask myself: How would I divide my assets once I... liquidate?

This mental exercise excited me for around ten seconds. It took me that long to realize that I don't have very much, at least in terms of what other people would want. I could make a case for my Kyle pillow, but then I'm less than willing to part with him, even in death. So then I decided to make a less realistic will and testament, which I happen to know is not weird, given that at least half of my friends already have their funerals planned out and have it their heads to play "Highway to Hell" or "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" during said occasion. With that said, allow me to share the partial list of things I'd be leaving to you after I meet my demise, were it only in my power.

To Aurora: Two Japanese men--one wee and dark-haired, the other an anonymous alcoholic--with a legitimately heterosexual friendship. They will readily don their couch costumes and sing their "Fray! Fray!" song whenever the occasion calls for it.

To Bi: If you're interested, you may avail of 天野喜孝's--whose birthday is in three days, by the way--skills via a l33t coloring pencil or a quill or something of the sort, ala Space Jam.

To Buta: The recipe to KFC chicken, as well as full ownership to the farms and/or laboratories--whatever the case may be--responsible for breeding Hot Shots. For your sake, I hope it's all about the mutant poultry. Bird flu and all, you know?

To Candice: I thought about this long and hard. Bowel movement.

To Debsoc: Residency, preferably in the SE Audi, for at least 6 more years. I assume we'll all have graduated by then, though I know better than to make promises on my part. Additionally, I would like everyone to receive the ADS-specific pheromone that drives adjudicators crazy.

To Greta: Legalization of plural same-sex marriages in the Philippines, socially acceptable to the extent that Mrs. Borja herself will attend all thirty-two weddings.

To Joey: You can tell your mom that it was a gift, you can't refuse those.

To John: For no reason I myself am aware of, you get the sponsorship of eight out of nine Greek muses. No wangst muse for you.

To KAPE: The title of "sole overseer of Oceania" shall go to one of you, preferably either Drea or Loh, as Prit and I have Eurasia covered. (Never mind that I'm supposed to be dead, this is a fantasy will, anyway.) We'll decide what to do about Africa later on.

To Kath & Tina: You shall have... lives? Er. How about a time traveling device that allows your other parallel universe selves to exist simultaneously in one universe, under the assumption that those other Tinas and Katherines don't end up creating a divergent-- Ah, screw it. Lives. That's what you two get. Lives.

To the Ateneans: Everything else, because whenever I think "eagle," I think "deus ex machina" from that third Lord of the Rings movie. Alternatively, I would like to grant you any and all superpowers or WMD's required of you to actualize whatever bloodthirsty fantasies you have involving the Ateneo. To the person who doesn't find that appealing, I would like to grant you an improved set of standards. (Kidding, kidding! Please don't flog me. Besides, jokes are only half-meant. Um. Don't beat me up. Really. What Would the Jesuits Do?) Forgive me, this one's the hardest. OK, I know! Third time's the charm. You guys get to end up with class schedules chock-full of Sir Dave. Cool? Cool.

To the Jewsters: Shiitake mushrooms, not only out of respect for our late Super Mario Brothers rip-off, but also because they're the Castlevania equivalent of tonics and potions. We need the energy exclusively derived from shiitake mushrooms to dominate our respective schools. It's bound happen, of course. It's the only reason why we were rationed out to different parts of the world/Metro Manila.

To the VP's: Self-replenishing liver-donating machines. To supplement this, non-threatening facial hair for Carlo to age him up, but not at the expense of looking like Edmond Dantes at the Chateau d'If. (I was going to say something about the Abu Sayyaf, but I have to cut back on the terrorist allusions despite the fact that it's just so easy to go there.)
status: predictable
musical score: "we've been had," the walkmen
sleepygirl: coffeeheartasl0versgo on July 25th, 2006 08:51 am (UTC)
sleepygirl: [alba] heeasl0versgo on July 25th, 2006 08:53 am (UTC)
And I'd love to have Sir Dave again :(
(no subject) - sirensongsanity on July 25th, 2006 03:31 pm (UTC) (Expand)
staylazydaisy on July 25th, 2006 10:37 am (UTC)
i was thinking of you right now and if i should make a post, but it seems you're still alive.

i super miss you, motherfucker.
let's get together soon.
Erissirensongsanity on July 25th, 2006 03:31 pm (UTC)
Hee, yeah, I figured it was time to show some signs of life.

We really should get together, it's embarrassing how long I haven't seen you. Jewster reunion, please.
21st century ninja: [ICKLE] OMG BIANCA CAN SPELL SEIZUREsoulpower on July 25th, 2006 12:51 pm (UTC)
I WILL TAKE YOU OUT. THIS SATURDAY. But you're just gonna refuse me because you're gross and buuusy all the time. Dude, you have to tell us when we can take you out! I miss you guys sososo bad. You especially, just don't tell the others. XDDD Oh, and YES. I WANT. Sigh, if only life were as easy as Space Jam... XDD;;;
Erissirensongsanity on July 25th, 2006 03:32 pm (UTC)
It's the journal! You're using it! Heck, you remember it! Hurray. This makes me warm inside.

Guess what, you're right about Saturday. You have to forgive me, though, by virtue of me being your favorite.
(no subject) - soulpower on July 26th, 2006 12:19 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - sirensongsanity on July 26th, 2006 12:30 pm (UTC) (Expand)
y_u_r_i_k_o on July 25th, 2006 02:15 pm (UTC)
Kape is taking over the worllld.

Wait, what falls under Oceania?
Erissirensongsanity on July 25th, 2006 03:33 pm (UTC)
Australia and a bunch of other places. :D Guam's in there, I think, and Papua New Guinea. Rise to the occasion!
(no subject) - y_u_r_i_k_o on July 25th, 2006 04:47 pm (UTC) (Expand)
A day in the life of the Human Googleballerynna on July 25th, 2006 03:12 pm (UTC)
Haffy Birfday by the way!
Erissirensongsanity on July 25th, 2006 03:33 pm (UTC)
Thank you, Miya!
(no subject) - onesideofjess on July 26th, 2006 12:16 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - sirensongsanity on July 26th, 2006 12:31 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - onesideofjess on July 26th, 2006 12:39 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - sirensongsanity on July 26th, 2006 12:47 pm (UTC) (Expand)
pic_char on July 25th, 2006 04:20 pm (UTC)
Happy Bday! Arr... I can't keep track of dates XD All I know is that its July right now (though sometimes I still think its June)...

I want school to start... I'm bored! XP
(No, not really... I just don't want to work anymore. Hihihi)

WMDs... *evil thoughts*
Erissirensongsanity on July 26th, 2006 12:32 pm (UTC)
Thanks! Haha. Um, it's... almost August. ^_^'

You're a working immigrant? Yay!
(no subject) - pic_char on July 26th, 2006 08:31 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - sirensongsanity on July 27th, 2006 08:44 am (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - pic_char on July 28th, 2006 02:09 pm (UTC) (Expand)
mkfrunrouen on July 25th, 2006 11:51 pm (UTC)
Oh gosh, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERIS!!!!!@#!$$&& :))
Erissirensongsanity on July 26th, 2006 12:33 pm (UTC)
Thanks, Mackery!

Hee, I've watched the little toast go up about ten times now...
johnbwa on July 26th, 2006 12:02 am (UTC)
aw, let me have the wangst muse. whose name i am too lazy to google. the point is i want her too. i must refine my skills. and i want to complete the collection.
it's very cool of you be considerate about carlo's sex life. he can freely get smashed and get a little sumthin' sumthin' too.
and i can't even have the wangst muse? are you kidding me with this?
21st century ninjasoulpower on July 26th, 2006 12:20 am (UTC)
roffle waffles
SOMEONE has to be considerate about it. XDDD You're putting a lot on the line typing in small caps. Then again you're compensating with the lack of PDA. Interesting. XDDD
(no subject) - sirensongsanity on July 26th, 2006 12:41 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - bwa on July 26th, 2006 12:58 pm (UTC) (Expand)
(no subject) - sirensongsanity on July 27th, 2006 08:42 am (UTC) (Expand)
h a b i b i: muffinblu_frenchfries on July 26th, 2006 09:50 am (UTC)
a LIFE?!

Where?! Where?! :((

Hahaha. Guess what. I didn't get to train today, so I got to go home early.. and i was excited... Guess why?! Because then I could study stat!! And the night before had me all giggly because I'd finished a paper, so I could study stat. Again. And once I'm done with stat, I get to do my other paper! joy! Why God.

Now that I'm done using a comment as a pathetic excuse to rant...

HAPPY EX-BIRTHDAY ERIS. :D I'll take you out, I promise. And... yeah. read with you. Haha.
Erissirensongsanity on July 26th, 2006 12:39 pm (UTC)
Wait, what? You were excited to study? That just gives me goosebumps. :O
(no subject) - staylazydaisy on July 26th, 2006 12:48 pm (UTC) (Expand)
dalagang_bukiddalagang_bukid on July 28th, 2006 03:55 pm (UTC)
Awww... ERIKA, but your gift would be meaningless unless you finally agree to marry me.. even ... just... 5 minutes! (yeah, let's beat britney spear's record or something) Bwahahaha
Erissirensongsanity on August 4th, 2006 01:59 pm (UTC)
Well, that's something to think about. Divorce is a rite of passage now, or something like that. Oh, if only I weren't against the idea of marriage, then I would accept your proposal(s) in a heartbeat. Alas, the world will not give me what I want.
(Anonymous) on August 3rd, 2006 06:35 pm (UTC)
I love how you think about my colon <3

- candalf
Erissirensongsanity on August 4th, 2006 02:00 pm (UTC)
Well, no, but...